THE ADVENTURES OF MR. NICE GUY
(Based on partly true events in
the life of a free-lance advertising consultant in Palm Beach County)
Mr. Nice Guy Sees the Bright Side
Mr. Nice Guy was back in town. His
attitude was good and his mind was clear, but money was short and his
car was old, flabby, and easily discouraged.
"The economy is bad," the car grumbled. "This is no time to look
for new clients."
"We'll find smart businessmen who need us," Mr. Nice Guy responded.
"Don't make me go on Military Trail," the old car sniffed.
Mr. Nice Guy stomped on the accelerator and the old car limped out
into Military Trail. A Cadillac, a mud-caked high-wheeled pick-up truck
and two stuck up BMW's braided a fancy pattern around the old chugger in
Later, by the time the hot sun had settled in the western horizon,
Mr. Nice Guy had received a mumbled "come back next quarter" from an
upscale body shop he had been romancing for two years, a promise of lots
of work but no sure pay from a software company having a hard time
beached in West Palm, threat of a knuckle sandwich from a new restaurant
that, in the words of the owner, was depending strictly on
"mouth-to-mouth" advertising, and a lecture on the meaning of signs from
a security guard who politely ejected him from an office building where
soliciting was discouraged in dignified, gold-leaf, Old English signage.
"Words in all Old English capitals are illegible," Mr. Nice Guy
offered in cheery, free consultation. But the security officer already
knew everything he needed for his life.
At least that day Mr. Nice Guy had managed to pull 15 column inches
of print ads from his old hip-pocket topless bar account on condition he
guarantee maximum exposure.
"We can buy gasoline tomorrow," he said to the car.
"Only five dollars," the car complained.
"And a can of tuna tails for the cat," Mr. Nice Guy mused, pleased
with not a bad day's work, considering.
(To be continued)
A Paper Movie
The Christmas Story
Mr. Nice Guy's Nice Luck
Mr. Nice Guy's
Mr. Nice Guy's